Another Take: ReelBob: ‘Old’ ★½

I felt myself growing older slogging through M. Night Shyamalan's newest cinematic clunker.

M. Night Shyamalan’s new thriller, “Old,” makes no sense.

It is an incomprehensible mess with a ludicrous plot, cardboard characters and inane dialogue.

As the movie’s 108 minutes progressed, I began feeling like I was growing older as well.

A group of tourists at a too-good-to-be-true resort are encouraged to spend the day at a secluded beach.

Nearly from the outset, strange things begin to happen to people — especially the children in the group.

You can guess what happens to them by the title, which should have been emblazoned in neon lights.

Everything about “Old” is silly. The adults continually run around like chickens with their heads cut off, trying to figure out what is going on, while people go through various metamorphoses — adults grow older, youngsters mature into teenagers then adults themselves.

I don’t believe revealing any of this is a spoiler, since Shyamalan titled the movie “Old.”

Throughout, the writer-director leads you down a path, dropping various hints about something hidden in the rocks or the cave that enclose the beach.

The actual payoff, which you will have to see to believe, is lame and as pedestrian as the movie itself.

The cast, which includes Gael Garcia Bernal, Vicky Krieps, Rufus Sewell, Ken Leung, Embeth Davidtz, Thomasin McKenzie, Alex Wolff, Eliza Scanlan and Emun Elliott, are given the barest of back stories.

Some of the people are dealing with medical conditions, while others have mental issues.

“Old” is basically an ensemble piece with no one performer standing out. Actually, the cast play more like types than characters and are mostly defined by their professions.

How the cliff rocks, the beach, or the water affect — or not affect — them is never made clear.

The movie’s suspense is negated by Shyamalan’s lazy and inept script that creates more questions than answers until the disappointing finale.

Shyamalan enjoys panning his camera around as his actors gather around the latest victim to gawk and gape.

The movie plods along while we wait for Shyamalan’s big reveal, which is as exciting as a bologna sandwich.

“Old” had the potential to lure you in; instead, you feel as lazy and calm as if you were sitting on a sunny beach. The movie lacks urgency, and even a pounding score by Trevor Gureckis cannot raise your interest.

“Old” continues Shyamalan’s long losing streak of indifferent and lazy movies that fail to generate any interest or passion among moviegoers.

Perhaps, Shyamalan is getting too old and should retire to a beach to rethink his career.

I am a founding member of the Indiana Film Journalists Association. I review movies, 4K UHD, Blu-rays and DVDs for ReelBob (ReelBob.com), The Film Yap and other print and online publications. I can be reached by email at bobbloomjc@gmail.com. You also can follow me on Twitter @ReelBobBloom and on Facebook at ReelBob.com or the Indiana Film Journalists Association. My movie reviews also can be found at Rotten Tomatoes: www.rottentomatoes.com.

OLD
1½ stars
(PG-13), language, disturbing images, partial nudity, bloody violence, suggestive content