Anyone can make a horror film.
That's the beauty of the genre; no huge money pot is needed to provide heart-stopping thrills and suspenseful chills. From "Halloween" to "The Blair Witch Project" to "Paranormal Activity," horror is often best sans big budget. Even the original "Saw" didn't have the glitz of its unending sequels; at its core, it was a morality play with a neat bear trap.
However (and this is a big "however"), successful horror is both well-worn and original. Successful horror infuses every word and mundane gesture with a sense of existential dread (well-worn). Successful horror integrates that existential dread into a fresh concept devoid of cliche (original).
"Bitter Feast" is not successful horror.
The premise is promising: Sociopathic celebrity chef on the decline (James LeGros) abducts notoriously nasty food blogger (Joshua Leonard), holds him captive in a remote wooded cabin and forces him into a battle royale of cooking challenges that morphs into a real-life most dangerous game. (Between "Bitter Feast" and "Blair Witch," Leonard must really like running through the woods.)
But like a boeuf bourgignon made with stringy stew meat and $2 wine, the film's failure is in the execution.
Why must LeGros, with his gray line of a mouth and 1970s glasses, look so much like a textbook serial killer that one wonders why only a greasy PI is on his tail? (Director Joe Maggio could take a cue from "No Country for Old Men," where Javier Bardem's cold-blooded killer sported a Buster Brown 'do, or "Inglourious Basterds," with its chatty, bon vivant hunter Nazi.)
Why must the genuinely stomach-turning close-ups of red raw beef, yellow egg yolk and mud-colored ragout be diluted with the same "scary" piano score heard in every lazy horror film? And why must the entire 104-minute film, instead of building that good ol' existential dread, feel so mind-numbingly boring?
With "Bitter Feast," Maggio sought to imagine the worst-case scenario in an already cutthroat industry with a low-budget souffle. Sadly, it falls flat.
DVD extras include an alternate ending and an interview with chef Mario Batali, who makes a cameo in the film and who, by himself for five minutes, is more entertaining than the film itself.
Movie: 1 Yap
Extras: 2 Yaps