Meg 2: The Trench
This flick's young, dumb and full of chum.
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As a fan of the first “The Meg” picture and of its star Jason Statham, I was stoked for “Meg 2: The Trench” (now in theaters). I don’t think the film is quite as assured as its predecessor (it opens strongly, lulls for far too long when hanging in the titular trench and concludes awesomely), but it’s young, dumb and full of chum.
Statham returns as rescue diver Jonas Taylor. We pick up five years after the previous “Meg” installment. Jonas’ girlfriend Suyin (Li Bingbing) has passed away from unspecified causes (Perhaps she served in Nam with Mutt Williams?) and he and her brother Jiuming (“Wolf Warrior” franchise headliner Wu Jing) have teamed to raise her daughter Meiying (a returning and much-grown Sophia Cai).
Jiuming is carrying on the work of his sister and father (Winston Chao) by heading an oceanographic society alongside billionaire businesswoman Driscoll (Sienna Guillory, she was Jill Valentine in Paul W.S. Anderson’s “Resident Evil” flicks). Assisting Jiuming in his pursuits are Jonas’ buddies Mac (Cliff Curtis) and DJ (“Blue Mountain State” co-star Page Kennedy … a real scene-stealer).
The society’s work takes our intrepid heroes to a fortress located on the ocean’s floor where they encounter ravenous megalodons and a mercenary named Montes (Sergio Peris-Mencheta, he was the big bad in “Rambo: Last Blood”) who’s hungry for revenge against Jonas.
“Meg 2: The Trench” is directed by noted British genre director Ben Wheatley (“Kill List,” “Free Fire”) and scripted by returning writers Dean Georgaris and Jon and Erich Hoeber. Wheatley, a master of the glum, grim and gritty, seems an interesting choice for something as glossy as a “Meg” movie, but he lets his freaky franchise filmmaker flag fly. He even goes so far as to employ an awesome POV shot from inside a meg’s mouth munching on miserable mofos … I could’ve gone for a few more of these.
The dumber this drivel gets the better! Jonas jousts sharks atop a jet ski armed with bomb-tipped spears. DJ – understandably suffering from post-traumatic stress disorder after the first film’s incidents – has learned to swim, trained in martial arts and possesses a boujee, leather Louis Vuitton go-bag containing a platinum-plated .50-caliber Desert Eagle pistol loaded with poison-tipped bullets à la “Jaws 2” and a sleeve of condoms. There’s even a f*ckin’ kraken!
I’m tempted to give “Meg 2: The Trench” a higher rating, but I can’t do so in good conscience. The trench segment – which amounts to one-third to one-quarter of the picture’s runtime – is just too much of a slog. However, the opening and ending both rock and are enough to carry the day. Fans of sharks, Statham and wanton stupidity should sign up.